Think Wink.

Has past since my grandfather passed away. I spoke of it the day after he passed (click here to read it) here on the blog. It hit me the Sunday before last that it has been a whole year. He died on a Friday and we had the funeral on Tuesday. As I remember that sorrowful weekend, Friday to Tuesday, I am drawn back to the funeral. However, I can still see my grandpa’s face as he slipped out of life and into death. It isn’t so much burned into my memory in a painful way, rather it is stitched in my memory seeing him at peace for the first time in years.

But I remember the funeral. It will always be a special time for me. My grandfather always loved to hear me preach God’s Word, but due to his ailments, he could never come to hear me. So the only thing that I could think of to honor his memory was to speak at the funeral. When I pondered on what I could speak of, only one thing came to mind: the resurrection. What better time to speak of our blessed expectation than at a time where death is so prominent. So I took 1 Thessalonians 4:13-18 as my text and probably made every dispensational, pre-trib, pre-mil Christian everywhere upset when I said that the resurrection and rapture are the same event. But that was the hope I wanted and still want my family to cling to: we will be raised to eternal life to enjoy Christ face to face.

Then I did something that connected me to my aunts and uncles in a way that has never happened before or since. For a moment, all thirteen of us connected on a very personal level that really opens up the soul and really grieve. My mother had this great idea. She is one of twelve siblings, eight girls and four boys. Sibling rivalry in among her brothers and sisters never really went away (but when does it ever?). So my mother wanted to help them see that their father loved them uniquely yet equally. Some of my aunts were really versed in the medical field and so were around him more during his last days than others. Other aunts lived or worked very close by to be there a lot in his last days. So we set out to remind to think of ways to show how unique and special and individual was grandpa’s love for each of this twelve kids.

But what really made that ten minute space of talking was not so much what was said, but how I said it. I personalized it to drive it home, and the Holy Spirit really honored that and moved mightily to help them grieve. I spoke to each of the twelve children (my aunts and uncles). It was difficult to get through, especially when speaking of my mother’s relationship with grandpa because…well it was my mother and I love her dearly. There are aunts or uncles that I don’t see hardly at all. But in that moment, I was more than a nephew or pastor. I don’t know how to describe it. But it was the sweetest of times for me. I thank God for that moment every day I think of my grandpa, which is most days.

I so miss my grandpa that I now have to eat bread with almost everything. From mashed potatoes and gravy to chicken or turkey cooked with noodles to chili. I just love to eat bread now. I really do miss my grandfather a lot. But more than that, I am envious for if he is in heaven, and I really do believe he is, he is experiencing raw, pure, perfect joy and beauty that can only be experienced in the presence of God, for he is that beauty and joy (Psalm 16:11). I remember doing so much with grandpa and wish there was more I could do with him, but oh well. The Lord did not will for me to and I embrace that will whole heartedly and joyfully. I hope my reminiscings bless you as much as they bless me.

This Time Next Year…

Fixing the BCS?

NFL Draft Talk